Conelly
Captain
Anmeldedatum: 26.03.2001
Beiträge: 4297
Wohnort: BRD
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Verfasst am:
08.11.2004, 07:49
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Why'd the chicken cross the road?
Moin!
Hab da was auf Section31.com gefunden. Sind ein paar witzige dabei... 
| Zitat: |
Adhar Ru'afo: The chicken needed to get the fountain of youth particles from the ba'ku, but they're on the other side of the road.
Admiral Forrest: I don't know. Soval doesn't tell me anything.
Alpha Hirogen: Give me the chicken! I will hunt it!
Anji: I don't know. I haven't gotten around to it yet.
Annorax: Prepare the weapon for total erasure of the chicken from time.
Artim: You need to learn to play more often
Arturis: It was taking revenge on those stupid borg lovers!
Barclay: Uh, chicken!! Where?! C-c-c-commander, did I ever mention my problem with small feathered things?
Bones: Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor not a ornithologist!
Borg Collective: Crossing the road is irrelevant. The Chicken will be assimilated.
Carol Marcus: There's a chicken on this planet! Well, so much for our Genesis test!
Chakotay: Whatever its reasons, whatever its goals, we should respect its right to cross the road and seek its own spiritual awareness.
Chekov: Vhat on earth do you mean, Keptin?
Cullah: It was probably very hungry and Janeway wouldn't give it any of her *BEEP* Starfleet replicator technology.
Comptroller Imp: Just because I dumped antimatter waste in the chicken coop doesn't mean he has to leave
Daniels: This isn't supposed to happen. History never recorded the chicken crossing the road
Data: The chicken in observing that it was on the opposite side on the 20th. century Terran paved roadway, was aware that its immediate goal should have been to traverse the distance without interception by any kind of combustion-propelled personal transport vehicle, but I am unclear as to why any kind of domesticated fowl should desire to perambulate upon a conveyance normally reserved for the use of... (Picard: Data!), yes sir.
David Marcus: It's just like I always tell you. The chickens have always been pawns to the military.
Decker: (To Kirk) As much as you want the Enterprise, the chicken wants this.
Dr. Bashir: I suppose it wanted to play darts with me. Do you want to play?
Dr. Phlox: Chicken? I don't believe my bat eats chicken, but I suppose there's a first time for everything.
Dr. Soran: His heart just wasn't in it (Scenes of chicken torture with nanoprobes has been edited out)
Ezri Dax: It probably didn't want to join with a symbiont
Founders: Jem Hadar soldiers, catch that chicken! It is vital to find the cure!
Future Guy: That'll teach Silik to fail me.
Garak: To get to the other side, of course not! Do you realize how ridiculous that is? I'm sure it was a simple matter of its farmer expelling it from the coop for... embezzling eggs
Gegen: Maybe its trying to find the planet of its true origin.
Gene Roddenberry: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before!
Gillian: Don't tell me they don't have chickens in the 23rd. century
Grand Nagus Zek: Stupid chicken! You don't cross the whole road at once! You sneak across it quietly, without anyone noticing. Inconceivable! What was I saying?
Gul Dukat: Well that's a very interesting question..I'm sure we can work out some kind of arrangement to obtain that information that will be to everyone's satisfaction
Harry Mudd: Chicken? I don't remember any chicken. No, no, no, there's been a terrible misunderstanding!
Hoshi: I don't how to speak chicken! Why don't you figure it out?
Hugh: Maybe it wanted to be my friend
Ilia: Detecting motor vehicle on roadway... Impact in 8 seconds... Impact in 5 seconds.... Impact in 3 seconds... Impact in 1 second... SPLAT!
Jadzia Dax: To get to the other side. Curzon might have disagreed with me, Tobin I'm sure wouldn't have had a clue, and then there's...
Jake: The chicken wanted to write an article about a Dominion attack on the other side of the road.
Janeway: Its primary goal was no doubt to get back to the Alpha Quadrant.. and it probably misses its dog.
Kai Winn: Come here chicken, the Prophets have foretold your coming to me!
Kes: It was remembering back to the times when its ancestors crossed roads all the time! They lost those abilities when they stopped using them.
Khan: With my last breath I spit at the chicken
Kim: I don't know. It's my first mission.
Kira: I bet those *BEEP* Cardassians were after it
Kirk: He probably just wanted...A PIECE OF THE ACTION!
Kruge: (Yells at the chicken) Give me the secrets of Genesis!!
Laas: It's looking for the rest of the 100 chickens
Leonardo Da Vinci: It was embarrassed by the ignorant people of Florence when it tried to fly and it is going to America.
Lwaxana: Oh, Jean-Luc!
Mayweather: (Sits silently wondering when the writers will give him a line)
Morn: (Begins to open mouth to give the best answer yet) Quark: I've heard enough out of you for today, Morn. Morn: (Stays silent and keeps his chicken wisdom to himself)
Neelix: Actually, Captain, I'm not really familiar with the chickens in the system. But if you can catch it, I can cook it!
Odo: I don't have the slightest idea, and I don't particularly care. I can never understand you solids' need to engage in such pointless behavior.
Pah Wraiths: There is no other path. It is the chosen one. It must cross the road.
Paris: Well, I think that...say that's a lovely shirt you're wearing.
Picard: That's not for us to answer! It's his fundamental right as a sentient being to determine the time and manner by which he travels towards his goals!
Prophets: The Chicken is of the Other Side of the Road.
Q: Wouldn't you like to know? Too bad your puny mind wouldn't be able to comprehend.
Quark: Now really, why would I have bribed him to do it so I could make a tidy profit in the station pool? Besides all I know is chicken tastes like tube grubs.
Quinn: It was tired of all the same boring things going on in the continuum.
Reed: Tactical Alert! All hands to battlestations. Charging phase cannons...
Saavik: Humor..it is a difficult concept. It is not logical.
Sarek: Sometimes my logic fails me where chickens are concerned
Scotty: Admiral, there be chickens here!
Section 31: I'm sorry that information is classified. I'll have to debrief you now and erase your memory
Seska: (To Janeway) You are a fool, Captain. (To the chicken) And you are a fool for following her.
Seven of Nine: I thought all individuals had the right to make their own choices. It probably wished to rejoin the collective.
Shran: Wouldn't you like to know, Pink-Skin
Silik: (Frantically) I don't know. I need instructions.
Sisko: He had to go fight the Dominion, but he won't rest until he's back here, on this side of the road where he belongs.
Spock: Fascinating. Captain, it appears to be driven by a beam of pure energy
Species 8472: The strong will survive. The chicken will perish.
Sulu: To get back to San Francisco, it was born there
Sybok: To search for Shakari of course.
The Doctor: How should I know? No tells me anything around here! I didn't even know we added chickens to the crew! All I know is that it would have been nice, before the chicken went off to cross the road, if it had remembered to turn me off!
Torres: I'm sure it felt suffocated by all the *BEEP* regulations of *BEEP* Starfleet and just couldn't stand any *BEEP* longer!
T'pol: (Is unavailable for comment as she is currently in decontamination)
Trip: Well the chicken can laugh all it wants, but it's not getting any of our bourbon.
Troi: It was running...running away from...no, escaping...oh, captain, it was fleeing from such pain!
Tuvok: I'm sure it was the logical thing to do.
Uhura: Shall I open hailing frequencies so you can ask it, sir?
V'Ger: To join with the creator
Vic Fontaine: (Sings) Here's to the chickens, bless them all!
Vidiian: Come back here chicken! Your organs will save a dozen lives!
Vreenak: I will not willing commit my people to try to figure out the answer to this question until I am presented with concrete proof that the chicken actually crossed the road.
Wesley: I'm not sure, but I can figure it out if I reroute these systems and reconfigure the warp field and run a complete whootchacallit on the computers and...
Weyoun: We are all one with the Dominion. The chicken is returning home to us.
Worf: I do not know. Klingon chickens do NOT cross roads
Computer: Accessing...A phrase common in the 20th. century, also known as a joke. The most common answer to such a question was "To get to the other side." |
Gruss B.
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